Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
Unfortunately, they didn't pull of their wake and bake plans. Instead, they waked and vomited like a half-retarded giraffe till everyone woke up.
Note to all middle aged "I totally let myself go after childbirth" frumpy mothers: I do not dress this way for your husbands. Stop looking at me like that. It's not my fault.
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
we found you under the sink... we opened up the doors and you told us to go away because you were playing indian in the cupboard
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
Boobs are out for the taking
It was like something out of a fucked up fairy tale. He just crowdsurfed over to her while riding a keg, said "come sail with me", and then the crowd carried them off into the night. What.
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
I'm eating lunchables with a glass of wine while I FaceTime the guy I lost my virginity to.
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
Seltzer and cocaine. Life is flawless right now.
I woke up with a bunch of jolly ranchers and an eight ball in my purse. Successful
I have so much to do, no motivation, and Harry Potter is on. You KNOW whats taking priority in my life right now
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
Randomize
