Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
i like that you affectionately refer to him as "creepy" ever time you talk about him
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
Dude...that line about her giving me a blowjob to get rid of her hangover actually got rid of her hangover. Spread the word.
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
I was sitting here smiling wondering why i'm so fucking happy at work. cookie has kicked in
I can't. I'm going camping this weekend. I do have a life outside of your dick.
I puked on her cat, I think I should at least buy her breakfast
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
I dropped my slice of pineapple on the kitchen floor and was just staring at it about to cry. It was really good pineapple.
Randomize