put your butt on the phone this is a booty call
He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
i left because you were standing at the top of the stairs throwing shot glasses and bottles full of alcohol at me and yelling JAGERBOMBS
I couldn't get past the raccoon on my porch so i slept on my lawn.
I want a burrito.
Truly, you are the voice of a generation.
I GOT A VENDING MACHINE FOR OUR LIVING ROOM
I found someone's tooth on the stairs when I was vacuuming, and my sister found a catheter in the men's bathroom... this cleaning job is dangerous
My new year's resolution was to squirt this year. I only have four months left. Help.
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
I got snowed in at my parent's. everyone's asleep so I'm smoking a joint in my old room and watching Tarzan on a 12" tv.
They must be so glad to have you home...
He couldn’t find my clit with a map. Literally. I drew him a map.
Randomize
