Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
You're obviously not trying hard enough. GET LAID. Kittens die for less.
Touche salesman.
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
I sent dad a photo of my graduation certificate from drug therapy class. It was his birthday so it seemed appropriate.
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
The worst part was when I went to go spit it out and rinse my mouth, his grandpa was in the bathroom, so I had to fucking wait. It was awful. I finally ran to the kitchen and prayed his parents didn't come out of their room.
Today is a wonderful day to be mildly hungover
Amnesty Wednesday? I'm free to do dirty things to you and you can't laugh or judge?
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
How am i even supposed to meet his daughter? "Hi, Claire, I hear we have so much in common, like we both love your Dad and also we're almost the same age."
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
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