remember that time that crown gas station wouldn't sell us a lighter so we had to use matches and birthday candles to smoke with a toilet paper roll? sometimes i miss high school
After we fucked, her eye wouldn't stopped twitching and she could only move her hand, which she used to put her number in my phone
OMG HE JUST PUKED WITH THE DOOR OPEN WHILE DRIVING ON THE ROAD AND OMG WE NEED TO CHAT BUT NOT ATM CAUSE THERES PUKE ON MY PHONE
I woke him up and he was mumbling something about it being moist, or he peed himself but it was okay.
Apperanlty I was screaming "It's hard to swim with a broken ankle sir" and then tackled the lifeguard. The joys of blackouts
You almost set me on fire last night.
You probably deserved it.
I should know better than to trust a man I've seen cry on multiple occasions to give me accurate sports information.
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
Pretty sure I was impersonating Rihanna when I kept asking him what my name was while we were making out
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
So I got cockblocked by our relationship status last night
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize
