I need to find out who his wife is so I can fuck her before he gets to mine.
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
Rent Disney Oceans. Smoke a bowl. Fast forward to the seal section. Then call me.
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
My face is tingly. And my legs are being massaged by golden elves.
I wanna take him on a special date, something that says I banged your brother but since he moved I want you
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
Walk of shaming into my apartment. No one to clap me in. Come home!
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
Randomize
