i just walked outside for a cigarette and three men walked by in glitter heels and gold shiny thongs. god i love chicago
My "High Times" magazine came in today, as well as my girlfriend's new sex toys. We're calling in sick today.
it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
Me + Nice restaurant + Copious amounts of booze + obscene comments to couples = valentine's day plans
Just hit on a fat chick so shed buy me a drink. Then i walked away. Nice to see how the other half lives.
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
just ran into a kid I used to hook up with while wearing his shirt. Only me. I tried to pretend like it wasn't his but it said his name on the back so I wasn't winning that.
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
I shoulda been born a dude. There's too much power in a vagina.
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
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