I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
You peed for a solid 5 minutes last night and turned around halfway through to give everyone watching a thumbs up
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
The doctor wrote 'condom retrieval' on my discharge paper.
Do you know who the random guy who just walked in to kiss me goodnight is?
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
it was just another one of those moments where you unfriendzone a friend you assumed to be gay
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
Hey sorry about last night. can I come pick up my tooth?
Plus idk what to say. Like hello dapper gentleman will you pursue me in a midnight hangout where I can be choked
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
Randomize
