Oh my god he is having a sentimental moment right now.
He just sent me like a really heartfelt confession of love in which he ended with "make the apt, I'll hold your hand while you get your clit pierced."
i just woke up i smell like fire, i have bruises on both knees and one elbow, i have a lighter and nip of smirnoff blueberry in my bed, rug burn on one hip and about 12 pics of you and me on my camera-this needs to stop happening
yea ive got to shower which is going to be painful given the skin burns from the blowup obstacle course races last night
I'm not even planning on drinking that much tonight.. but I'm writing "emergency contact number" and your number on my hand just in case
As I was buying milk at the market, the lady at the checkstand said, "what? No alcohol today?" have I really earned THAT reputation?
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
After he was done he gave me a case of landshark and tickets to tomorrows yankee game. This is the best nonrelationship ever
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
So I have to masturbate in a hospital. I wonder what kind of porn they have.
I'm at the level of despair that only Panda Express can fix
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
The guy I hooked up with two weeks ago just friended me on Venmo, I honestly won't be mad if he pays me for the sex
My Dachshund waddled into the room carrying a rolled-up pad in her mouth with period blood. This day is clearly off to a good start.
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