i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
A 14 year old with a teardrop tattoo just tried to sell me weed. I'm in the wrong fucking neighborhood.
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
Oh FYI, people asked how/why I met you and I didn't want to say "drunk at a party on an air mattress" so I made a story up. It was a very cute and charming story with no alcohol.
If I had a mugshot, I would totally use it as my main picture on Tinder, just to keep it interesting.
Watching Faye Reagan porn all weekend for St Patty's day. Nothing has ever seemed more appropriate.
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
I still have to bake cookies and shave my legs so Mike can have MILF & cookies when he gets home.
Please wake up and help me figure out how I woke up on the floor with my head under the couch
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
Randomize
