Facials are how you say "I love you" in porn star.
I just told the 2nd grade class leprechauns are the children of midgets.
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
bro...we were banging on her floor and her dog walked in and started licking my balls
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
I would totally lead with that as a line.'So, I was on Legends of the Hidden temple as a kid.. Your place or mine?'
I don't know if you've ever seen a group of 20 year olds reenact a rectal prolapse, but 'majestic' isn't really the word I'd use...
my poor anus
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
In the past year, I've fucked 3 Dave's and you've fucked 2 Dave's. That's a lot of Dave's in our vaginas.
We need to start a soap opera called the Dave's of Our Lives.
Randomize
