...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
where are you
in your bedroom
how did you get in
your wife…
WTF
no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
fyi, we didn't break up, we just downgraded to occasional sex without ever talking about it.
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
Tonight, I'll be cleaning. And by cleaning, I mean drinking booze and spraying everything with Febreze.
I may wear a condom to jerk-off tomorrow knowing that my hand has touched surfaces in this bar.
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
Lynn just told me "I heard about your divorce. Condoms or morning pill your choice and I'm buying". Sorry but I got plans now bro.
So this morning everyone commended me for puking over the porch. No one else made it that far...
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
He’s over 6 feet has amazing posture and went to Harvard and has an awesome job and a great dick and loves Jesus and is an organ donor
Is this the guy you have listed as free food in your phone
Noooo he’s listed as free food #5
Randomize
