Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
We couldn't get our shit together to go to the bar, so we're getting drunk and facebook stalking all the girls who have gotten fat since high school. Any names you wanna throw out?
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
Met my future wife peeing in the men's room. I stood in for the missing door on the stall. We really hit it off talking about how her butt didn't even touch the seat from all the years of squat lifting in high school.
You just stood up, raised your glass and said, "I'd like to thank the academy" then fell through a glass table. THAT'S why we cut you off.
If we can put a man on the moon, I'm sure we can turn a pringles can into a bong.
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
Oh, and one of the worst parts... his name was Mario. I fucked a Nintendo character.
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
When I go to hand him the blunt and he's eating a cookie and responds with "let me hit this cookie"
She texted me this morning asking why all of her house pillows were inside her mini-van.
So thats where i built my buckingham palace
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
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