If its vodka, everyone is attractive. Tequila, everyone is dead sexy, single and fuckable.
just apologized to a random stranger while waiting in line for coffee. last night was that drunk
Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
Her husband keeps getting drunk and making out with me. Good news is I found the strep carrier. Bad news is have strep again.
Theres a fat guy wearing a speedo. Someone just got puked on, and didnt even react. Whats happening?
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
I'm at a bar. It's body paint Wednesday. All of the waitresses are topless. Help me
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
Randomize
