Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
What time are you coming? Can you stop and get mouse traps and trojans?
You have mice?
no why?
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
felt a little awkward waiting for my McNuggets after vomiting all over the counter
Thanks for not waking me up before the firefighters chopped down my door
I miss the days of selfishly blowing a load in the condom without her knowing and acting all like "we shouldn't do this" so she would get dressed and leave.
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
When you get up and look at yourself in the mirror, don't be alarmed. The doctor assured us last night that it looked way worse than it actually was and there won't be a scar when the stitches come out
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
Can you tell dad to stop liking and sharing porn on FB again?
I almost got an A in organic chem but started hallucinating during the final so I got a C
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
I'm declaring this weekend Captain Morgan weekend
You declare every weekend Captain Morgan weekend...
You just don't understand... :'(
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