YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
my dad just encouraged me to do a kegstand
they need to just BURY HIM!
he asked me what things i liked that he did in bed, and i told him all the things i hated so he would use it on that new bitch and she wouldnt hook up with him anymore.
you for real need to get over him dude
I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
just passed out again, this time at a subway. On a positive not they gave me a free sandwich, pretty sure out pity but at this point i don't care
I have a gash on my leg an a lobster leg in my purse.
It's like I'm snorkeling in an ocean of tequila.
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
if it doesnt flame it aint got game is a bad drinking motto eyebrow-wise.
eyebrows regrow, your balls dont
I should not be allowed to be in possession of a fifth and a phone at the same time.
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
I haven't had sex since the Vanilla Ice concert
Please don't have sex ever again just so you can say that forever.
Randomize
