It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
I GOT EATEN OUT IN A MERCEDES ON A TUESDAY NIGHT. I EARNED THIS SHIT.
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
I think need to divide my DVD collection into "movies I've seen" and "movies I've only seen during sex"
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
Which I'm also surprisingly fine with. If he walked into the bedroom naked, holding a fish in one hand and a lit candle in the other and said "Let's get fucking weird." I'd probably go with it. He's just that hot.
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
Well after the shots I danced with a homeless guy, split my toe on broken glass, and had a 20 piece mcnugget. Who says postgrad life is boring.
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
Please come over. It's a pajama and burn-2016-in-effigy party
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
Randomize