ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
can u get pink eye on your cock?
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
I have three paper towels stuck up my vagina. This is not a time to be calm.
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
You could have chosen coming to fuck me over getting too hammered to drive. But you made your bed, and now you get to jack off alone in it.
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
He's coming over, and I hope he doesn't get hungry. I'm sure its not proper protocol to bring one booty call to another booty call's house for the munchies.
This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.
I'm actually not sure I need to run today, between the crazy monkey sex and breaking into my own house.
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
How many times have you told me to call 911 this week?
Lol twice
The next morning I found her spread eagle asleep on the living room floor and he was asleep with his head in her crotch. I needed a ride and had to wake them up.
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
Randomize
