i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
Her husband keeps getting drunk and making out with me. Good news is I found the strep carrier. Bad news is have strep again.
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
It's either my own vomit or popcorn butter in my ear right now. Banking on the second one.
We made popcorn last night. So it's both
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
If I had 3 wishes one would for sure be a designated driver for life that gives hand jobs.
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
I'm sorry I put my balls through your watch. On another note your roommate had them on his shoulder too sry
fuck emotions I should've gotten more cats
And then you poured the rest of the vodka into salsa and added the alcohol soaked pineapples and grapes and said "don't touch my salsa breakfast".
Dude, they hit that lizard part of my brain that tells me to fuck people.
Preach sister.
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
Randomize
