Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
I feel like abortions should bother me more
I swear to God, I saw my life flash between my legs.
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
tell me why there is a bowl of oatmeal from starbucks in my purse
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
Excuse me, but I got friendzoned and all I could think about was the fact that I didn't have my underwear back on yet.
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
He knocked me in the face with the phone during my light show. Didn't even feel it. Ecstasy is amazing
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
I’m lazy so obviously looking like a rotisserie chicken is my favourite position
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