I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
I threw up into my coffee this morning.
my fraternity brothers just had an intervention for me. i either have a problem or am just on some next-level shit, im gonna go with door number 2
Either I'm a lot drunker than I thought, or he has three dicks....
I think I'm gonna have to go with the first one...
I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
he woke up with $200 in his pocket and had to buy his cell phone back from a hobo at the bus stop.
Why did you leave me a note saying 'find the canary'
dude, I'm passing out in the fifth floor janitors closet. Let me know when the rooms opened back up
I'm still a bit day drunk and decided to go for a run. You may get a snapchat of me vomiting soon
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
The dick lei will go down in squad history
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
Dude. Don't do acid and go to Disney on ice. Hear my warnings. That snow monster will fuck your shit up.
Randomize
