I lined up everyone's pillows and I'm playing Evel Knievel when I jerk off later.
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
I wanted to take a shower but I forgot we made applesauce in it last night.
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
And then you told me I had large hands and looked like a girl who would have an illegitimate child that I never talked about
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
I'm really sorry that I blew your friend in your bed, but to be fair he started it.
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
At some point, you're going to have to talk to a tree and do what it says
i got kicked out of McDonald's for demanding a margarita mcflurry
She couldn't understand why my walking in on her 70 year old parents ruined any chance of a boner for at least an hour. I think she's too slow for me to fornicate with.
Just drink your champagne out of a trophy like a fuckin winner
Good news my life of crime finally paid off
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
Randomize
