Saw a pregnant woman get a lap dance last night. I love the south.
do you think they make "congratulations unfit mother" greeting cards?
or abortion recommendation cards.
I only had sex with her cause she looked like jwoww from jersey shore
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
Her mom offered to give me a lap dance. I was a guest, I couldn't say no.
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
Oh ya, I forgot to tell you, last night I woke up to the sound of you peeing on the floor next to the fridge, didn't remember until now. Have fun at Dayton!
I snapchatted him nudes and he didn't screenshot a single one of them because he's a gentleman.
I just wanted to tell you that the German word for "dickhead" can also be translated as "ass violin" and I think that's beautiful.
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
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