put your butt on the phone this is a booty call
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
he just ordered a side of pineapple and winked at me. too much for a first date. come get me.
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
You won’t make it to November. A 21st bday and Halloween in the same night has shitshow/ jail written all over it. So I call dibs on that tall guy
3pm strippers are depressing
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
Randomize
