Hey, It's Lauren. i wanted to talk to you tonight. I like you, as you know because kyle told you. I was wondering if you liked me too?
Are you in the third fucking grade? Check yes or no.
so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
Just walked by a guy on campus YELLING 'Im still hammered'
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
I know it's pride week, but your asshole is just never supposed to taste like banana.
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
I just found your ripped underwear on my chandelier. Care to explain?
I changed his name in my phone to "Irrelevant" last night. Not changing it back.
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
The awkward moment your booty call shows up to the Mexican restaurant and realizes you just picked burritos over pussy
Guy running next to me at the gym is judging me. I think he can smell the whiskey leaking out of my pores.
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
Change of plans & whoring it up tonight
Randomize
