yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
There's a 24 hour period after giving head where you can't eat penis shaped food without me laughing at you
Haha crisis adverted. Just told my dad I need to bone this guy. Nbd. He totes understands
Mystery solved. Def had ice creme last night. There is a melted half eaten ice creme bar next to the bed. Which had melted onto my pillow. That explains why it was in my hair too. Im a fucking sherlock holmes over here.
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
Idk man, most things I eat are even better than I expected. Like when I drunkenly put mac and cheese on a slice of cheese pizza or when I soberly put mac and cheese into a Taco Bell burrito.
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
I'm suffering a hangover from deep within. I feel like the half of the parts of my body are permanently laced with alcoholic substances
The part where he comes over and ignores you isn't what makes me mad about that story... It's the fact that he ate your tacos, AND THEN proceeded to ignore you. That's cold hearted.
Sarah was butt-chugging wine and diarrhea'd all over the wall
I just want to order a very large pizza and get very drunk and very laid.
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
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