Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
just found out i fit into magnum condums. this is going to be the best weekend ever
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
Got back to find Sarah in her underwear eating peanut butter and watching Arrested Development with the thermostat at eighty.
My book, "How to Live With a Huge Penis" was delivered today. Can't wait to read it in public.
I woke up at 5am to tell him I wanted to take his dick on la Tour de France, I might need a nap later
you started shaking the frozen steak while screaming "THIS IS CAPITALISM" before rubbing it all over your chest and passing out on your dog
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
whenever dudes said you had nice tits you'd scream at them "This double push-up bra is full of deceit and lies!"
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