yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
Did you spray paint that captain morgan fifth that's in the freezer gold?
Dude I think my special talent is falling in drunkenly falling in front of a cop and getting away. This is the second time.
You tried to call "time out" during the sobriety test.
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
Also 70% sure I have a splinter on my eyelid from last night
mhmm. we know where to go, which places have free bathrooms, how long you can be in one until its sketchy, we have this down to a science. we're like the college sophomore pregaming dream team
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
it's unicorns you uncultured swine
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
Randomize