he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
We just described beer as "big boy apple juice" to his 2 year old.
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
I had to sleep with my math professor to pass algebra. Apparently my blowjobs are only C+ quality
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
Listen I took a family sized bottle of merlot to the face last night and there's an svu marathon on. Give me some time please.
i got kicked out of McDonald's for demanding a margarita mcflurry
Don’t fucking talk to that dude from monday!! Ethical consumption dude, don’t fuck shitty guys
Cover your peen. We're going out.
He was passed out, face in the toilet, so I just pissed on his head. Serves him right
she wants homewrecking advice
are you gonna teach her your ways?
obvs. i'm like her yoda.
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