After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
Yeah I don't remember why I went to the hospital though but I just called and they have my wallet
I saw a crackhead in a ballerina outfit riding a bike while waving her hands and one leg in the air. Never seen such talent in my life
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
WHY IS IT FROWNED UPON THE DRESS UP IN CAT COSTUMES AND SIT OUTSIDE OF BARS WITH A BOX OF WINE I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
I just smoked a joint and ate a sandwich while watching someone get arrested. Bonnaroo is a silly place.
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
If you bring home Chipotle tonight I'll give you an epic bj...ball play and all #datenight
I had the bathroom of girls sing you happy birthday while you puked. I couldn't stop laughing. They were all so supportive
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
Randomize
