Haha so you are never gonna want to meet my mom now...she just found your thong in her front seat
dude you apologized to her after she called you stupid. you were like "no i'm sorry, you shouldn't have to be around stupid people, it's my fault"
dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
the fog machine set off the whole complexes fire alarm
That girl gave me her number because you were arrested. I am so proud of you dude.
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
Finished sriting an apology letter to my liver 2 weeks before st. Patricks game on
You just sent me a picture of a federal crime. Like. You don't give a fuck.
You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
So do you want to hear how I got the hickey first, or how I got the black eye?
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
Randomize
