that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
Yeah sketchy neighborhood.. Some woman ran by screaming, "i didn't steal anything" as some cops rolled up and arrested her.
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
If you don't want me in your apartment then lock your door better
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
Okay, so when I go to meet your grandma, let's do a quick cum check to we don't have another "what's that on your face?" situation.
I think she tried to suffocate me with her tits...she almost succeeded.
She has the best kind of daddy issues
So as you were leaving, you leaned on the table too much and 3 glasses slid and fell to the floor. You then looked at me and said "To be honest, glass isnt that expensive anyways" and stumbled out of the bar.
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
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