You tried to convince her that if she gave you head she'd hear the ocean.....
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
fuck he's narrating my life in a british voice make him stop im way too fucking high for this
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
You guys I wore sweatpants to work today because I simply forgot to put on real pants and I had a weed brownie and a juice box for breakfast. I am not ready for parenting.
do you remember yelling out "insecurity makes my pussy dry!" unnecessarily loud at the bar?
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
Just found out that the guy I lost my virginity to voted for Gary Johnson. It's almost more upsetting then him ending up being a massive asshole.
So the same great-aunt that told me to freeze my eggs for procreation just told me that I should strut around the dance floor b/c I'd get picked up.
I need to meet your family.
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
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