she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
it's kinda bad that we're already planning travel arrangements to his funeral
I just headbutted my cat because he was trying to eat my bacon.
The second I saw you stumbling down the stairs in a princess crown, I knew I had a friend for life.
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
there is a dorito bag in my car full of my mouth blood
He came so hard he burst a blood vessel in his eye. Do I have to take him to the ER? because I'm too tired for this shit.
She sent me nudes via email. What the fuck are we still in the 90s? Grow up
When I woke up next to him on the living room floor, my glasses were broken and it felt like someone rubbed a cactus all over my vag
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
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