Everyone knows that the fastest route to a corporate advancement is to take a shot in the mouth
We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
you're the one who masterbates every night to the titanic soundtrack
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
Ya know what's been the best part of this College Football Season? Not having to hear Brent Musberger say the Honey Badger 77 fucking times.
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
I got home at 1 am on a weeknight with lube in my hair. I'd say it was a successful first date.
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
Its safe now. But... Nobody should sleep on my bed tonight.
my mom is drunk and is trying to get me to take a picture of her ass. what is life?
Randomize
