when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
Apparently I farted on her in my sleep. Then, just to be sure she was cool, I did it again on purpose and she didnt say anything. So, WIN?
I walked out of the bathroom and both of you girls were giving the gay guy head. I was like, "laaaterrr."
better question... why wasnt i wearing a cape the previous 20 years of my life???
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
he was holding his dick in one hand and my boob in the other and i looked down and thought, this is my life
Casually had to file a missing persons report last night
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
The things happening in my intestines right now should only ever happen at truck stops and frat houses.
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
Please tell me that nice older woman you're with at the bar is not your comp&lit professor.
No, this year you're all getting coupons for things like "no yelling because you had sex in my apartment" or "the last beer."
Randomize
