it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
why do i have 22 missed calls from someone who is literally saved in my phone as bumrape star??
someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
I'm telling everyone at work the mark on my neck is a hickey but really I was taking a shit while straightening my hair and burned myself
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.
On my way home right now. I miss you. let's cuddle. whiskey.
I've never seen a grown man cry so much after getting jerked off by a stripper. I say it's the best $600 he ever spent.
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
You were in the girls bathroom yelling at some random chick because you thought she stole all the urinals. That's why you were kicked out.
He's just been a dick since he set his face on fire. I just wanted to eat a fucking hot dog.
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