Something growled at me in your dark backyard last nt. Hoping it was my landwalking laser sharks and not Andy.
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
I'm sitting in the drive through at Mcdonalds right now watching the workers pressure wash the vomit I left from last night.
bring money and cleavage
Only I would come home from a random banging with beer and watermelon
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
you closed your eyes and pointed to a cupboard..there was vodka on the top shelf. your sixth sense is amazing. plus, we convinced the foreign kid you're a booze whisperer
My chest smells like french fries. Get at me attractive men.
My g-ma saw your dick-pic and wants you to know I've got a keeper. She says her big whopper died in Korea. Good thing g-pa is still asleep.
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
He was telling me how he was trying to grow up. And then 2 minutes later, he told me he was tripping on lsd for the first time.
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
Randomize
