does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
What the fuck. The girl next to me just looked at her phone, put her stuff away, and popped a birth control and ran out of class. Lucky fucking guy.
I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
What I'm trying to say is, that time you chained me to my dresser and made me beg for it was incredibly romantic.
We'll find out our level of friendship after tonight. You'll be helping me move a body. My body.
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
Let's just say we ended up at Denny's with a strippers shoe that we had to discreetly leave at the door to the strip club this morning
Dude. He almost took three different girls home, all while dressed up as Amy Winehouse. If he goes as Kurt Cobain next weekend, we're screwed.
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
I wanted one last NYC adventure and I got it. Now I just have to figure out a polite way to wake up the pantless former stripper illegal Russian immigrant street violinist chick currently in a vodka coma in my bed.
Don't take a pillow from my bed. You don't know which ones of them my vagina has been on
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
Randomize
