Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
I bought a zebra print bikini, I'm gonna be honest here- if he doesn't want to have sex with me in this, he's gay.
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
He's cheating on his wife, and he's judging me for eating McDonalds
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
I told her my hands were paint brushes and her vagina was my canvas
Hey, if I can't get it and you're still alive, can you get the glass out of my foot? Happy Sunday.
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
I think we have it figured out.. She's my wife when she's here and gives me advise on how to get ass when she's 1500 miles away.
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
Last year you twerked on my Christmas tree and threw up all over the bathroom...in front of my parents. We should probably keep power hour to ONLY an hour this year
So it turns out "let's pretend to be gay so guys will stop hitting on us" was step one in her plan to get me into bed...
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
Listen, you eat the donut. I eat you out. Everybody wins.
Randomize
