i have your red jacket for some reason. and a good deal of shame and embarasment. note to self, wear underwear when you wear a dress. also, i was electrocuted last night. dont ask how.
SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
can you explain why there is a dead rabbit in my front seat?
idk, I had a turtle in mine.
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
They thought "watering it down" meant adding more vodka
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
My roommate made me a peanut butter and sprinkles sandwich. Maybe tonight isn't that bad
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
I mean, the night I fell out of that bus I made you pour vodka onto my wound to clean it, then duct taped a paper towel to my hand and kept drinking.
The girls said some drunk guy in footie pajamas was asking for me when they opened the doors. I thought we agreed you were gonna stay home and microwave me some bacon.
Was make out with a 38 year old lesbian on our bucket list? if it was you can go ahead and cross that one off.
We have been dating for 5 months. I'm friends with his sister. Yet my number in his phone is still saved as "hot bartender"
Randomize
