i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
here I sit at Southern Illinois' finest pubs and I thought I heard your laugh. I was sadly astonished to turn and find a midget cracking herself up reading the label on her can of chewing tobacco...
I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
I'm one shot of soco 100 away from fucking a mailbox
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
He handled me like a finger puppet on crack... Time to ice the vagina, I'd like to sit down sometime today.
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
Now I'm heckling that my belch is more exciting than their fireworks and I peed down the driveway.
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
I've come to the conclusion all of your awkward and complicated male encounters could easily be intercepted by a man town Yankee candle and a vibrator. Sleep on that tell me your thoughts in the morning. Sweet dreams.
WHY DID HE INTRODUCE ME TO HIS MOM? CAN'T HE JUST HIDE ME LIKE EVERYONE ELSE I'VE EVER DATED?@!
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
I dont think you understand. A NOODLE FELL OUT OF MY VAGINA! I DEMAND TO KNOW WHAT YOU DID TO ME LAST NIGHT!
There is no way entering a gas station bathroom memorializing an alien abduction in rural New Hampshire is a good idea.
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