I wanna passion pit in your ass
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
I have a busted ear drum from when he honked his horn when we started to have sex on his car in the parking lot...
Witnessing a crazy lady on the bus screaming about how romney is one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse.
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
I'm pretty sure I lit a prostitute's cigarette while sharing a pizza with a homeless guy last night
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
Is it weird that my ex and the dude I'm talking to now both only have one testicle? Apparently I've found my type..
If you ever "miss" working, I'm going to fist you with my hulk hands. BOTH of them.
The good news is I woke up fully clothed, on top of my covers, with a half eaten granola bar. So, breakfast was waiting for me and I’m already dressed and ready to go today.
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
Randomize
