Um....I woke up to a lipgloss covered bottle of Jack daniels in my arms..
You've kissed worse.
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
The random guy I fucked from craigslist said I had the best smile. I take compliments where i can get them
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
im just going to make a prayer circle of top ramen packets and cheap beer
I just started the bonfire using a tampon. Who knew they could have multiple uses?
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
Drake has all the answers
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
I'm owning this being a social human being thing tonight!
I feel like a weird modern Betty Crocker. I'm icing a cake and looking at gay porn, if that's not an accurate portrayal of the 21st century idk what is.
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
And then I woke you by humping you to Lionel Ritchie.
Randomize
