that shit musta been laced I laughed for two hours and everyone looked like penguins
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
i'm face down in a ditch right now please help this is not a metaphor for my life this is real.
Awkward drunk fist bump with the boss. Not sure if tomorrow will be weird or wonderful.
I felt kinda awkward walking into his house in nothing but lingerie and my dead grandmas overcoat
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
Like I blink, and he's face first in my vagina.
Never in my life have I seen a grown ass man get on all fours and attempt to buttfuck himself with the leg of a chair. I love Vegas!
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
Hey I know we haven't talked in a while, but I wanted to thank you for those m&ms you bought me for Christmas. Sorry I never got you anything then broke up with you.
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