All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
Soo i just shotgunned a water balloon...
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
i finished masturbating and realized my blackberry had accidentaly called my grandmother in my pocket during it. awkward...
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
omg just made cake vodka jello shots, sooooo excited
dear god these taste like death. death and sprinkles
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.
I feel like there's no sexy way to pull 12 condoms out of your bra.
That dude with the beard walked up to me, turned my water into wine with everclear and kool-aid, and walked away. Pretty sure drunk Jesus is back.
Well his dad is my dentist so they've both been in my mouth.
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
I fucked her with a giant balloon tied to my dick. You tell ME how my night went
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