it doesn't mae me god, the fact that I am god makes getting dressed futile and tedious... btw i am still drunk
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
I woke up to a hotel manager knocking on my car ( window was down) and asking if I was ok
I'm just gonna get real fat and join the circus.
We had hangover sex and then I called a taxi home. Told him I didn't want his number because, if it was meant to be, we would fuck again. He called me the queen of one night stands.
Good morning sunshine. Care to hear the riveting tale of Michelle and the Almost Great Night That Ended In An Early Morning of Karma Emptying It's Bowels On Her Guilty Shoulders?
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
i need some magic done to my vagina
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
In the past year, I've fucked 3 Dave's and you've fucked 2 Dave's. That's a lot of Dave's in our vaginas.
We need to start a soap opera called the Dave's of Our Lives.
His nipple licking is glorious
Randomize
