But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
i'm starting to get really nervous about the relationship i have with my cat
You hit on the cop telling him you were celebrating the anniversary of your 21st birthday and ur boob job... That's how he got ur #
ah tequila...
this blows. i told the guy at the bar that i was the DD and it was like i just announced over megaphone that i had genital herpes. no one will talk to me now.
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
2 things: 1) can you get hep from toilet water? And 2) do you know where we can get a new skillet for cheap?
Please tell me those aren't related.
I made rice.
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
Randomize
