chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
Having a race with the dryer. Seeing who can get drunk/dry clothes faster.
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
I wouldn't have puked last night if I didn't inhale straight pepper from you shattering the pepper shaker on the wall.
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
I left the guinea pigs on the dryer. Make sure to take care of them.
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
Is "sorry I booted you out mid-fuck last night" a good icebreaker?
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
But we only had three ninja turtles. So everyone that would ask us where Donatello was, we would say "what? He's gone? Shredder is at it again!"
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
I was actually kind of excited. I mean, how many people can say they've been question by the CIA?
In a meeting I sneezed and my tooth hit the floor. I don't think anyone noticed. I would still like to die now.
Randomize
