Nah got too drunk to function...probably could have dragged something home over my shoulder if the cops didn't roll
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
they wouldn't let me take the pitcher of beer on the ferris wheel
She told me a motorboat isn't successful unless they come out gasping for air. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!!!
Imagine getting a FB inbox "hey I found your ID on the floor of a bar can you send me a mugshot so I can get a second piece of ID made?"
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
He showed up riding a bike blasting the ghostbusters theme song. His name was Lasercat. Im in love.
I just lit a blunt like right in front of an old man and I was like sir please shieldeth your eyes
Well supposedly when the cops came, they say I tried to get them in a conga line like Jim Carrey in The Mask. So....yea
...I just melted into my bed. I am one with the bed. I am 600 thread count.
I brought those bastards cookies so they can deal with my sex noise, fuck them and their roommate asses
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
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