She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
How many times can I tell him I wasnt expecting sex before he realizes I'm just too lazy to shave all the time?
Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night?
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
Wake up. Pour coffee. Open blinds. Guy is skipping class and jacking off furiously to Asian porn. Close blinds. Finish coffee. So this must be what med school is like.
if I open my eyes, my head will explode. that hungover.
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
He just kept mumbling that he was too drunk for society and then he peed in a bush
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
Your roommates will be treating you to many anecdotes about my intentions to have aggressive sex with you. I'm sorry in advance.
Yeah I don't think your wife thinks it's a good thing that you're fucking your cousin.
my goal is to never have a bac of 0.0 the whole time while in the state of florida, which means i have to chug a beer before i cross the state line
I got really worried when i woke up and there weren't any missed booty calls from him between 3 and 5 am. Apparently his gf is in town ...
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